capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
