How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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