Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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