he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
Randomize
