I don't think brook has ever known best
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
