and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I feel like death gave me a hand job
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
