And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
