covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
