I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I fill condoms, not promises.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
