well you can't waste a boner
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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