Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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