is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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