I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Randomize
