so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
being pregnant is like rehab
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Come on in and take your pants off
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