You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
