awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
