There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
It's blow job season.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize