Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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