I am in a vortex of obligation.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Randomize
