this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
