oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
