I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Too much gin, very little bucket
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize