Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
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