Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
