If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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