So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize