I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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