Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
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