When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize