I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
