you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I touched a dick in church today
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
