I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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