did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize