How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
