We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize