Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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