i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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