They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
