I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
if i died would you start the facebook group?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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