Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
