I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i just google imaged poop.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
