Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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