Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize