: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I want to fling myself into the sun
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
