i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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