I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
