Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
