I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
