Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Randomize