Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
