I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
